My husband has a good job. He enjoys what he does, and he earns enough that I am able to stay home with B. I'm grateful for that. Unfortunately, he also works weekends, holidays, and otherwise unpredictable hours.
I certainly knew this before we had kids. I anticipated the nights alone and the 12-day-stretches. What I didn't think about was the impossibility of having regular family traditions when one parent may or may not be available.
There are some things that I can't do alone (cutting down the Christmas tree) and others that I simply don't want to (having breakfast with the Easter Bunny). This past year we rushed through the Christmas morning gift opening so that Daddy could get to work.
Living back here I do have other friends and family with whom I can celebrate, for which I am grateful. The Christmas that we spent in North Carolina I sat in church by myself on Christmas Eve and cried. Holidays are the worst time to be lonely.
Obviously we do what we can. We get the tree another day. B and I head to breakfast by ourselves or include other family or friends. We're just in the formative stages of family traditions, anyway. Still, it doesn't feel right that family traditions may or may include Daddy. I feel bad for him for missing them, and bad for B and I for missing him. Things get overlooked or adjusted. It's not the same.
I know I should be grateful for Ray's presence in my life, and B's, and I am. But traditions are important to me, and I'm striving to make them meaningful as well as fun.
I know I'm not the only one in this situation. How do you form family traditions in your hectic lives?
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